Pardon My very long post, but I can assure you that It’s definitely worth the read.
Welcome to my blog, How are you holding up in this new week? Remember your attitude determines your altitude. Whatever attitude you put into your everyday life is what you will get out of it. So positive vibes only.
Today’s post is about the Kemi Adtiba’s “King women series” and my title already gave me away. I intend to do a recap of all of the series so watch out for subsequent Wednesday blog posts. Why I started from Episode 7, I still cannot figure out, but I know for certain that I could connect more with Funmi Victor Okigbo’s narration than the other stories that I watched.
Here is how the recap is going to run:
- Who is this “King Woman”?
- Lessons Learnt
- Link to the full Video
Till the day I saw this video, I’m not sure I’ve ever heard about FVO, but after watching this episode, I realised that a lot of people are doing great things and are not ringing a bell about it. Funmi Victor Okigbo (FVO) is the CEO of No surprise Event. From the video I watched, you would know she is a disciplined and highly organised leader that is super creative and unapologetic about her aura and confidence. She is also a very creative storyteller. I particularly love her body language.
So, here are the important notes I took away from FVO’s story;
LOVE IS A VERB
The English Man defined ‘Verb’ as “an action word or a doing word” and she made me see reasons to eventually agree that Love is less of feelings and more practical. Every time she spoke about the relationship between herself and her mother, you would realise that love is more than just a feeling and more of actions because her mother genuinely loved her. Mothers love are eternal and so real because they always want to show it even though sometimes they use the wrong approach.
When she was much younger, she felt that her mother wasn’t loving her enough because she didn’t express the love in the right way. In her words, she felt her mother hated her because she never allowed her any minute of indiscipline.
FVO made me realise that Love has to be deliberate and defined. When she spoke about her relationship with her daughter she emphasised the fact that Love would be greater if there is an action (Communication) attached to it. I confirmed my statement of love being a verb when she spoke about how she and her husband became an item. She spoke about how she deliberately put down her ego to make the relationship work. Isn’t that remarkable?
DISCIPLINE WITH AN EFFECT
I just love this woman perspective to everything. When she talked about spanking her child, she made me realise that if our parents communicated with us about the wrongs we have done before punishing, we would probably have seen reasons with them. But what most of us got as kids is the fact that we were spanked for every little offence and that truly didn’t change us. What is important for us as parents and potential parent is to teach our kids consequences of taking actions. In her words:
“There has to be an objective not just spanking a child for no reason
because you don’t want to toughen the child up.”
BE YOUR OWN PERSON
In this current dispensation where social media has given the millennials an e-book of how to live their lives(Instagram) being your own person might be a bit difficult. After listening to her narrate her story of how her mother deliberately took her to a different secondary school because she perceived that she wanted to flow with the “cool kids” of her primary school, I then realised that the gospel of “Being Yourself” cannot go out of extinction. Sometimes breaking the rule and heading towards that narrow and dark path is the breakthrough that you need.
YOU CAN HEAL
This was the most emotional part of the video for me, this is also the only place that I saw her become emotional. She talked about how her mother died without any prior notice.The touching part of the story was the fact that she and her mother had a fight a day before and the day her mother was to die, her mother was trying to reconcile but FVO wasn’t ready for reconciliation so she reluctantly accepted, unknowingly for her, that would be the last time she would ever speak or see her. She revealed that it took her a year for the pain of losing her mum to go away but it eventually did. So I’m saying this to anyone reading this right now, you can get healed from that hurt and pain that you are feeling right now. It’s okay to feel bad, angry, sad, mad for a while but it’s not okay to remain like that. You have to come out of that experience with a lesson to hold on to.
THE FINALITY OF DEATH
Death is inevitable and it’s important that you think about death and try to prepare ahead for that day. I’m not saying you will die young and not fulfil mandate but it’s important to live your life with the consciousness that death is inevitable and the person that spoke to you an hour ago might be dead by tomorrow. Don’t be afraid of death, but don’t live in its isolation because once an individual is gone, s/he can’t be recalled to fix things.
THINK OUT OF THE BOX
Sometimes I feel like this phrase is already overrated. Every time you I’m at a gathering, it’s almost certain that I’d hear the phrase “Think outside the box” but for the first time since I became an adult this phrase made sense to me. FVO talked about how she tasting a caterer food at her mother’s funeral made her venture in the world of event management. She thought about being a caterer that isn’t going to soil her hands but would bring together people were ready to soil their hands, face and teeth to make the job a perfect one.
This quote of hers summoned up everything:
“If you find yourself in a space that you are constantly irritated about
that thing that means your calling is to fix
This video had so much that I can’t pin down. You should just watch this video. Here is the link to the full video
Have you seen the interview before now? What other lessons or inspirations can be drawn from this experience? I would like to hear your thoughts on this so I can know If I should Continue the series post.
***Hugs and Kisses***